I could not love Mimi Smartypants' blog any more than I currently do. The latest post reminds me of how inept I am at writing, and how edgy and funny she is, and also that Wheat Thins really do have ridiculous marketing. To wit:
The back of the Reduced-Fat Wheat Thins box curiously depicts a lovely-looking home office setup, all seafoam walls and beige linen organizer boxes. There is a vintage-style wall clock and a charming little green ceramic pitcher being used as a pencil cup. Also: a full cup of coffee, a clothbound book with a blurry one-word title that looks a lot like a personal journal, and a bulletin board with post-its saying "Lunch @ 11:30" and "Call Corinne." And the box of Wheat Thins, of course. So we can deduce that this person likes Wheat Thins, is probably female (based on the Pottery Barn-ness of the desk accessories), and that she doesn't work too terribly hard.
Then there is the box copy. Tagline: "My space, my snack." Below: "You don't compromise in your daily life; you shouldn't have to in your snacks. Reduced Fat Wheat Thins are the best of both worlds: Full of crunch and the amazingly delicious taste of Wheat Thins---all with 35% less fat than Original Wheat Thins Crackers"
a. Yes, there is no end punctuation in the original. Odd, especially since someone bothered to use a semicolon correctly.
b. MY SPACE, MY SNACK. Well! You go, girl! Own those low-fat crackers!
c. Could this be more blatantly chick-targeted? You've got the luxurious Real Simple-styled desk scene. You've got the me me me, my space, my snack, perfect for that whole "time to myself" marketing focus. Which strikes me as particularly ironic because the woman with that perfect-looking office---who has lunch dates and who apparently keeps a journal in longhand---probably has no trouble whatsoever with the time-to-herself thing.
d. The more I think about that first line, the more it makes me laugh. "You don't compromise in your daily life; you shouldn't have to in your snacks." Who is this take-no-prisoners, make-no-compromises snacking woman? A combination of Martha Stewart and Chuck Norris? Damn it, no! I will not compromise my snacks!
e. I have not investigated yet, but I doubt the full-fat Wheat Thins box is this conflicted. I buy the low-fat ones because they are saltier, and nothing is salty enough for me except maybe a salt lick garnished with French olives. I did not expect the box to have all this baggage about compromise and claiming one's space.