I'm busy working out and improving my diet in the new year, but now am wondering what I did to make this happen: I look like Dakota Fanning.

Also kind of like two Asian actors. And two actors who maybe aren't completely dissimilar to me, Lauren Graham and M-L Parker. (Ok, maybe I just like their work better than, say, Sharon Osbourne's. No offense Dakota! You were bril in "Charlotte's Web"!)

Happy New Year (almost)!

Here is a not-to-do list, via Kiddley, a site that makes me feel like I have way too much I ought to be doing...regardless, enjoy and use this as a guide to help you make your New Year's resolutions. Mine is not, sadly, to blog more. It was to give up trans fats a la New York City, but today I had the most delish fries at Cloos' Coney Island so I might give up all the other foods so as to enjoy the fries. I do that at Five Guys anyway - no meat, but an entire bag of peanut-y fried goodness.

So maybe I'll resolve to enjoy myself more. I've decided that I'm my favorite person and so why not spend a little more time together? I might just take myself out for some one-on-one time. Listen to my inner thoughts more. Get to know me that much better.

Either that or keep on not smoking.

TO LISTEN:

Many, many songs are traditional spirit-boosters in our household...the classic Wynton Marsalis Crescent City Christmas Card is an all-time favorite. We love anything jazzy pretty much, and have even embraced Diana Krall's seasonal recording. That isn't to say we don't explore indie rock Christmas...and this year there was nothing more fun than Sufjan Stevens' collection of the gifts he gave his friends over the years.
(full disclosure: I don't own it, but am kind of hoping I do by Tuesday afternoon.)

But if you are in the mood for something lighter, may I recommend the Justin Timberlake guest spot on SNL's newest digital short?
TURN THE VOLUME DOWN IF THE INLAWS ARE AROUND!

TO LAUGH:

My brother, who loves a little fart humour, sent me two funny links today. This is the easy way out, but I'm taking it: I think my twelve days of Christmas feature are going to amount to about six...but I will be back at it on the Eve or Day. And I'll go til the Epiphany. So we'll see. In the meantime:

Try a couple of holiday favorites on the fartsichord. You know you wanna. This was more fun than I thought it would be. I enjoyed typing in "mount reindeer" and "grab self".

Do you think this is for reals??? (via Trent)

TO DONATE:

This time of year is the hardest financially for many of us, but the more you give the more you'll feel better about the state of our sorry world. I promise. And, if you give now, you get the tax deduction for '06. That's why I love to just dole it out this week and next.

Online, you can visit fun, easy sites for the children to help start discussing philanthropy, including the Salvation Army's SnowDays site. To be honest, this could be a sham, but it is kind of fun. And don't forget to drop your change in the bucket on your way out of the Teeter.

Shaw University's jazzy Christmas tunes are a great cause. Visit their web site to listen and click on "pledge form" to donate.

We give to the church this time of year because that is how we were raised. Now that I work there a bit, I actually see the good that area churches really do. From hosting homeless families to paying electric bills for strangers to providing support for me and my rich white friends when life sucks....well, organized religion has its merits.

On a global scale, it is most glamourous (and holiday-appropriate) to go RED....I love all that stuff. Can't wait to see my sister-in-law's red iPod Mini.

Mostly, just look out for you and yours. Selflessness is not always fun, but it makes life better for all of us. So suck it up.

FOR THE SWEDES:

My husband is one quarter Chilean, making him dark, sexy, and full of machismo. Another quarter is South Georgian, making him a lover of collard greens and fried meats. Yet another quarter is midwestern, which is why I love him. And the final quarter is Swedish. The Swedes love them some Christmas. So in celebration of Jul, we'll go over some of the fun traditions of that cold and blustery? land. (Hell, I don't know the weather. I do know Hanna Andersson though.

First, you'll want to make a Santa Lucia crown and hat. Santa Lucia died on the 13th and folks celebrate this Italian saint by letting blonde-haired children walk around with candles in their hair. It's all very special.

Our Swedish relatives enjoy glogg, but not enough to actually drink it...maybe because they are too busy drinking coffee, which they do all day. Real Swedish coffee involves eggs, but I won't discuss that in case bad memories of the Great Salmonella Incident of ought 6 come up. The relatives love to push the lutfisk on you, no matter what time of year. I am sorry I never got to experience the evil fish crap on Christmas Eve, but I have had potato sausage and damn is it good.

I also lurve lingonberries, on everything, especially Swedish pancakes.

Finally, to finish out your Swedish holiday, I recommend you go to a Lutheran church and greet your people. Not a bad group of folk, Lutherans. Garrison is their poster child.

Ok, enough Swedish! I have to get on the ball. I've given you only four or five days of a Whilst Christmas...but there's more to come. Assuming I survive tonight's alcoholic onslaught.

TO EAT:

It wouldn't be Christmas without my tasty Whole Foods truffles, available in the preferable chocolate or the cappuccino flavors. About $4.99 a box at WF. Now they are making the truffled roasted walnuts too, but those have not stayed in the house long enough for me to form an opinion. Obviously SOMEONE likes them.

North Cackalacky represent! Don't let your holiday season slip by without the wholesome Salem goodness finding a place on your table.

My husband's favorite recipe involving the amazing Indian River grapefruit and oranges we get this time of year, thanks to the high school's fundraiser, is a red wine/dijon vinaigrette poured over blanched asparagus, orange or grapefruit sections, and avocado slices. So festive! From one of our many Nathalie Dupree cookbooks - she is Georgia's answer to Paula Deen. Oh wait, Paula Deen is from Georgia, too.

There is no better appetizer this time of year than Olive Balls. I can personally guarantee their success at your holiday event...especially if any member of this family is invited.

The other Whilst traditions at Christmas involve a fun coffee cake that my mother makes...but to get that recipe would mean she is dead and I just don't want that at this point. Of course we always indulge in the Georgia tasty Fresh Air barbecue treat (no web site for the Macon location) no matter where we are...turkey be damned! And I hate my friend Brooke for introducing me to the whole concept of sugared peanuts. WHY??? Why did you do it? My new morning meal is the evil peanuts, with a smattering of red and green M&Ms, and half a grapefruit. Breakfast of Champions.

We'll return to my Twelve Days Whilst Christmas Approaches feature, but I was interested to learn that Muhammed Yunus went to Oslo to receive the Nobel Peace Prize. SEE? I'm not just a Justin Timberlake-obsessed female with mommy blogging tendencies! Anyway, I've been reading an article on microfinance in the New Yorker. I've not finished the article, and I've been reading it for two weeks now, but I'm getting the idea. Provide monies to the poor, and in many cases (especially in Latin America) to women, and charge them interest and give a payment schedule, and entrepreneurship may win the day. The success stories in the article are modest, but they are successes nonetheless, and I hope to get to the end of the article with a better idea of a new kind of charity...a pro-commerce kind.

The magazine is in the bathroom...but now that the Prize has been awarded, I've decided to upgrade it to the bedside table.

How does a microcredit bank or loans to the very poor compare to the feel-good and splashy charity of "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition"? And does Ebay really signal a chance for people the world over to finally trust one another and become players in the global economy on their own scale? Discuss amongst yourselves.

My family finds it hard to be trendsetters, but thus is the burden we bear. I hope they had a very nice time of it. We sure did.

TO VISIT:

Boylan Heights Arts Walk. Sadly, you missed it. By far, my favorite artwork was in Rebus Works, open year-round. So you are in luck.

Extreme Makeover Home Edition house in progress.
This is all very exciting. This is taking place three doors up from my husband's old apartment. And this freaks me the hell out. I'm sad they tore down a 1920s bungalow. I'm very very sad for the neighbors next door to the family who will have to see the awesome structure all the time. I'm heartbroken about the deli worker in the grocery store today who stopped one of the men in blue Extreme Makeover shirts and thanked him and told him it was her favorite show, etc. and that she hoped one day HER house was chosen.

So if it is your thing, go on by. The family is certainly deserving. (Along with the most of the rest of the neighborhood)

Governor's Mansion tours. Hours vary, though I think this week is the only open week. I can't find anything worthy on the web to direct you to, but if you live here go on by: the Carolina Hurricanes Christmas decorations shouldn't be missed!

TO WATCH:

Here is the best listing of the tv specials that I could find on quick notice. We missed Charlie Brown, but that is because they showed it in early June and we just weren't prepared. Sheesh. At least wait until December! I guess network can't compete with cable.

I'm not necessarily a big fan of the famous Christmas movies. I've never even seen "It's a Wonderful Life" all the way through. "Bad Santa" is up on my Netflix queue, though. A classic in the making?

If anything, I remember Christmas scenes in movies that aren't necessarily Christmas-y. Harry Potter always has something festive in his films. "Little Women" has a lovely Christmas moment. All the Austen films have some Michaelmas talk. There is the Christmas tension in movies like in "Ordinary People" and "About a Boy" and that thing with Sarah Jessica Parker that I saw last year...that looked funny and then Diane Keaton dies.

The big debate in my household is whether to let the children see "The Polar Express" or not...I've heard it can plant the seeds of doubt. And there is already a sprig growing here. We also are dubious about "The Nightmare Before Christmas". My son would love it, because he is just that sort of death-obsessed violent freako that Tim Burton would enjoy as a dinner guest. But my daughter is a sensitive flower...we'll just have to see.

One can hope. This guy is from Macon, GA so he really was dreaming.

And thus begins the 12 Days of My Kind of Christmas, or Jingle Belle, or A Concerted Effort to Keep Organized and Not Too Anxious This Here Holiday Season.

TO DRINK:

The Fresh Market's "Christmas Traditions" coffee is a favorite from way back. They call it "Christmas Blend" now, due to some trademark issue, but it still tastes the same. Even people who don't like flavoured coffees like this one. Even girls who gave up coffee because of salmonella poisoning and its ongoing health problems will be brewing some come December 1.

Whilst the Slate reviewer hates it, I still think Silk Nog is the bomb. I like making French toast with it, and I feel good about serving it to my family versus pouring up a glass of high fructose corn syrup + nutmeg. Available at local grocers.

I had this Prosecco with my Thanksgiving turkey, and think it will be just great with all the other holiday goodies too. Maybe too good to mix with POM.

And because I am now a tea snob, I have to give a shout-out to a tea that has been good to me even during the years I was strung out on coffee. I found this tea in England yea many years ago...but saw it just the other day at Southern Season and boy was that nostalgic and fun. The tea is called Spiced Christmas tea, and it is yummy and orangey and all things Brit.

(If you need a tea ball, consider the charming and locally produced tea stick).

My body failed me a bit this Thanksgiving...as it has many times before (see salmonella episode of summmer '06, and seizure disorder of the Furman U. years). I had cramps, a bad cold, and a thrown-out back all in one week. Surely some of it was due to the stress of traveling 8 hours to GA with the youngsters (though they were very easy), then 5 hours to the mountains with my mom (though she was pleasant company), and then 5 hours back after a few days with all the relatives (though the warm and stunning mountain setting offset most of the tension).

My mind didn't fail me. My new liquor and coffee-free self was not quite as anxiety-ridden. And I was able, with only one exception, to observe the family drama and not participate in it. One wonderful night I immersed myself in the attentions of my oldest friend and her gorgeous, enticing family, and after he arrived, in my husband's affections. I reveled in my not-empty bank account - a definite bonus from the stress of working outside the home. I thoroughly enjoyed a lovely prosecco that my buddy and I purchased at the mecca of foodie goods. I watched my children act lovingly and appropriately and I played games with them and talked to them about issues big and small. I slept in. Twice. And I didn't see all of it, but I got to watch the first half of "My Fair Lady", which is something I did on one memorable Thanksgiving. Together with my hubby, I re-read my wedding vows, which were spoken on the Saturday after Thanksgiving 14 years ago.

Now on to the holiday rush. I plan to give you, my adoring public, all kinds of holiday tips and festive Internet finds in between running the Christmas pageant and shopping and decorating. But I wanted to stop for a minute and remember Thanksgiving. I didn't fail to be thankful.

I never have gotten to attend my local Stitch n' Bitch group's meetings here in town, but I like their vibe and I certainly enjoy their free tips. Their new cause is aboycott of "Sew Fast Sew Easy". Seems like the knitting world is always full of angst...

That said, I made some headway today in my knitting. Didn't finish my daughter's halter top, which at this point is so big it could fit me and my "girls", if only they weren't really really droopy, like overripe eggplants or..ok, you get the picture. But I did look into my hostess gift idea for the holidays, and I bought mySELF some yarn, by God! I will make myself something for once. A light blue scarf - perhaps a small rib, extra long and cozy. Yay. Thrice yay.

I really tire of the phrase "not your father's" this or that. Or sometimes "not your grandfather's" or "not your mother's". It is over people. Newsweek uses it at least twice in every issue. I saw it today in the freaking Times. What demographic do they suppose that phrase speaks to at this point? I remember the commercial. We all do, now that it will live on in perpetuity in the American lexicon.

Grrrr.

The juries are in, and Borat is a hit (though maybe Tim Allen will conquer the weekend box office receipts with that Santa movie), but more importantly my boy Sacha Baron Cohen is finally a star. Madonna saw him first, but we were quick to jump on the Ali G bandwagon. Borat was always our favorite character. The New York Times goes on and on about the brilliance of the satire and his poke-funedness and how Cohen's Jewish background comes into play. I'm sure I'll be able to to wax on all that after I see it, but I am just eager to laugh my ass off and weep tears of happiness into my Mr. Pibb.

My husband told me that the buzz is that if Borat does huge box office this weekend that the Academy won't recognize Cohen...but he is so revered that just maybe he'll get a nod for Best Supporting Actor. And why not? In the (somewhat garbled) words of Jean Girard, "you taste of America".

This has been out for a while, but it made me happy today, for four minutes or so. Some yummy pomme frites and walnut-encrusted duck leg made me happy for almost an hour!

"Consider earphones a social cue.
Wearing earphones is like hanging a “do not disturb” sign off your nose. Like an engrossing novel, they help you avoid interactions with annoying strangers on airplanes or subways. Unfortunately, they send the same go-away message at work. That’s useful if you wear them only when you’re on deadline, but your iPod is more likely to irritate co-workers if you hide behind it eight hours a day." - from The Morning News' correspondent Margaret Mason's article on iPod etiquette. I've posted on iPod etiquette before, I believe it was after I found out my friend Lynn wore hers TO THE DENTIST. I like this choice in concept. After all, who really enjoys the strange, controlled, one-sided discussions you have at the dentist? The brief spurts of talking between spits. But in practice, wearing the iPod during the teeth cleaning sends a message that seems a bit hurtful to the very kind dental hygenist and/or dentist on whom your pain management depends. And that is dangerous.

In other news, Halloween was fun, on the whole. Pumpkin carving and eating witch-shaped pasta and trick-or-treating were highlights. Right before Halloween we were "Phantomed", which is a new neighborhood "game". That I hate. Like her. I agree that it shares qualities with a pyramid scheme, or even worse, a chain letter. After a chiding phone call from a Mrs. Robin Guard-Davis who said she was chair of the Phantom Commmittee, and that I was officially on Phantom Probation for lying to my children (only for a day or two - I finally gave in and told them) and for not making homemade snacks, I tried to lighten up and enjoy the Phantom ride. (Mrs. Guard-Davis, as you may have guessed, is a pseudonym for an equally vitrolic and non-domestic neighbor who thought it very funny that I didn't tell my children we had been Phantomed. ) I swear - each holiday becomes more and more tiresome the closer we get to it, and that, folks, means something has to give. I can't take my children out of school, I can't avoid the church anymore than I already do, and I'm already seen as a bizarre mom who - gasp - likes to just hang with my family and play games....so the answer lies somewhere else. Where? I'll keep you posted.